I'm friggin' pissed! 

Someone ate my last half gallon of vanilla bean ice cream that I had in the sub-zero walk-in freezer. It was clearly labeled "TINY WIGHT's VANILLA BEAN ICE CREAM, ASSHOLE. NO TOUCHY." 

I just got back from the grocery store with all these sundae fixin's and now I'm standing here with MUD on my face. Whoever took that ice cream, I swear to you "I will punch your fucking lights out".